People Underestimate the Value of a Good Ramble

Monday, June 14, 2010

Guilt and Failure

I'm feeling very guilty.  I told myself at the beginning of this year (which was approximately 20 some weeks ago), that I was going to read more, blog more, write more in general, watch less TV, work out more and eat better. Um...I've been reading a bit. Does that count?

Then I had to go make myself feel even worse by reading this post on Zebra Sounds.  Sure, there are actually people out there who make a plan and stick with it. Then they brag about it. I hope Judy's happy now.

So now the guilt and failure are building up and I have to do what I do best: slap myself around because of it.  I go through all the stages: guilt, depression, anger, ice cream, hope and failure.

I want to be a better person. I want to post on my blogs every day. I want to spend time reading something interesting and informative (and not just re-reading Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 8). I want to work on some of the writing projects I have started and abandoned when things got too hard (like those people who adopt puppies and then can't care for them).  I want to start that new eating plan I spent time researching (I even have two weeks of meal planning, a grocery list, recipes and everything all set). I want to get up just a half an hour earlier and work out every day (or, you know, like maybe 4 or 5 days a week, at least).

I just haven't done any of those things yet.

So, Judy, thanks for kicking me where it hurts.


judy said...

On the other hand, you got a post out of this! If you could have seen me this weekend, feeling very defeated and largely incompetent, you would realize how much better off (read well-adjusted) you are. <3

2girlsonabench said...

You know, we are the same way. We make huge goals for ourselves, stick to maybe half of one and then get upset - feeling that "guilt and failure." Here's our best advice from the bench - make smaller goals. Maybe start one thing a month, not all of them at once. Or post your blog once a week - or every other week, get that habit down, and THEN move on to increasing it. We stick to once a week for ours, and you know what - we're proud that we can make that goal every week. See with smaller goals you set yourself up to succeed a little at a time, instead of making yourself insane with impossible and overwhelming expectations.
So keep up the goals - just not all at once - and good luck!